CONFIRMED! TED CRUZ CAUGHT PRACTACING BLACK MAGIC

During a riveting debate last between Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders and Texas
Senator Ted Cruz all hell broke loose.

As Sanders talked down to small business owners a oily black film washed over
Cruz’s eyes. He began speaking in a archaic language that could on be translated
into “facts”. Dark grey clouds began to surround the stage as the senator
approached Sanders.

Still droning on and on about how the middle class needs to be paying for his
fourth house, Sanders rant came to an abrupt holt. He was lifted of the ground by
an levitation spell and turned around to face the master of the dark arts.

The only thing that could be heard from Sanders trembling mouth was “Feelings”?
Cruz chuckled and promptly ripped the Vermont Senators heart out. The audience
gasped in horror as the debate monitors tried to regain some sort of control.

The lifeless body of Sanders hung in the air as Cruz began to read the entirety of
the Constitution and the Bill of Rights to slowly beating heart. Once finished he
slammed the heart back into the senator where life returned to his body.

This happened several times through the night. Bets were placed by the audience
members and the debate monitors at what point Cruz would give up. The
Constitution and The Bill of Rights was read to Senator Sanders heart one
thousand seven hundred and ninety one times.

Well played Cruz. Well played.

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